A very special thanks to all who prayed, THE LIVER TESTS WERE NEGATIVE SO FAR. no need to biopsy as of yet but we will continue to watch it. I am getting an outpatient surgery on Wednesday morning - it is the first of 3 epidural Steroid painkiller injections in the base of my spine. then 1 more each month for the next 2  months. This is one step closer to solving my 1 and a half year of constant tear jerking tailbone pain 24/7.

Now, for all you that are keeping score on the cancer front, I am going to the Dr Later today to schedule a radical neck dissection on my right side (yes the same side they just removed 2 nodes to biopsy last week). They cannot do the left side yet cause cancer is not showing currently on that side so we have to wait for it to return -- insurance reasons -- but when I show any sign there --- WE GO ALL IN and remove everything from that side also. (liver will remain monitored also). after this next surgery I begin Chemo again and for those who remember - I don't do well at all with it nausea wise so expect a lengthy hospital stay on IV's for hydration and nutrition.

I really want to take a moment to thank EVERYONE who still tosses a couple to several dollars each month (some even every pay). It means A LOT TO MYSELF and MY WIFE. $5 pays for a couple of my scripts on walmart's $4 list, $10 covers my pain meds (2nd most important) and most importantly  $10 covers each of my anxiety and depression meds (keeps me from eating a bullet along with the love and support from my family and my twitter friends) Without you all I could never afford the many many scripts I need each month. $25 covers a Dr visit copay which adds up to several hundred most months. ***special note*** to all who don't have the means to donate. Hey, I get it, the economy sucks and you have your own financial problems. Just remember I respect you just as much as the people who do donate - love and support are very important too and I appreciate all emails I get at [email protected] or my brand new acct.  [email protected] made just for my cancer stuff.  They give me strength and hope and hearing the cancer stories of you or your loved ones - like a way for both of us to vent.

Wish me luck in my upcoming weeks. If you have the means, donate. (wife gets killed on gas coming to visit me in hospital and the bills don't stop). If you don't have the means - Pray,  send warm thoughts, give a good luck bro message to me or even take a second to even think about me. Karma is a good thing and I will take it.


I really want to thank @TheBrawdCast  @DisruptiveRadio  @Mstrb8tr  @OpiesV  @FNsnatch @cactuspete  @jagerdavid  @akaPRock  @jennie97  @HammyCatra66  @NSRGarret  and everyone else on the 2 shows and in chat last Saturday, I was a mental mess and you guys really raised my spirits and inadvertently talked me off a ledge.  THANK YOU ALL WHO WERE THERE!!!!





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I just returned from the Dr's office after finding out that the lymph nodes they just took out were full of cancer and I will probably have to have a radical neck dissection on both side of my neck now to get them all before it spreads. They say my cancer is acting WAY more aggressively than this type normally does. I will have a cat-scan Friday morning because they also found a spot on my liver that may be cancer. will have to do the scan then biopsy to be sure but we are being as aggressive as the cancer in going after it. so all we know for sure at this point is both sides of my neck have cancer and possibly my liver. I will be undergoing chemo again, which for all those keeping score did not go well last time (6 mos in hospital from being so sick from it) I have had all the radiation I can have so I believe that is off the table. This will certainly leave a strain on my wife financially driving back and forth to the hospital so as usual - Any and All Donations are welcomed and appreciated. I will try to post as often as I can with updates from the hospital or home, wherever I end up and when I have internet access. keep up the retweets my twitter friends and GET YOURSELVES CHECKED REGULARLY no matter how young you think you are. Let my story be a lesson. 

pray, send warm thoughts, think about me - do whatever, I will take it... Peace



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Bad news, looks as though my cancer may have spread to the other side of my neck. Biopsy didnt work out so they are going in next monday and opening up my neck to remove some lymph nodes.
there are a couple important nerves in that side they must watch out for so keep me in your thoughts over the next week or so. I was also told if it does show up again on my left side (the original side) that I will possibly need to have Radical Neck Disection including the removal of my jugular vein (apperantly you can live without it).

So keep my in your thoughts (and prayers if Tony Danza reads this) (all my fellow pests should get that one) and if you have the means, toss a five or a ten my way to help with the new scripts I am sure I will need along with the extra co-pays for all these dr appts in a row lately. The company I worked for where I have my Cobra insurance through just had open enrolment for their employees so I am sure  my cobra will be going up this month too (I just don't know by how much yet). I will also have surgery soon on my tailbone / lower back to alieviate this unbearable pain I have been complaining about for a year + now. I will post again when I get out of the hospital this round.
LATERZ PEEPZ


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Anybody had this procedure called  radiofrequency ablation ? My dad had it, I believe on his knees but I am thinking about having it for my lower back and tailbone because I have pain that is absolutely un-friggin-bearable. If anybody else has had this done, let me know how it worked out for you at [email protected] 




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Now after a series of extra Dr visits this month and a few more to go yet, I am in need of money to fill the extra prescriptions that I have gotten this last week and later today when I see my family DR. Main problem is they just change meds up all willy-nilly like you can afford to throw out the ones you are not on anymore and wright up something new that has to get filled. Unfortunately, the perverbial check runs out far faster than the month. So, any of my fellow pests on twitter that can afford a $5 or $10 donation, it would be very much appriciated as those small donations = copay on a prescription. I thank you all in advance.  :-)






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Had my Catscan assisted biopsy last week of my lymph node on the right side of my neck. 5 samples were taken, none had any testable material so no results and no idea what to do from here about the possible cancer relapse. 

Now as for the unbearable tailbone pain I have been complaining about for a year and a half, finally after like my 3rd go round with X-rays, a significant abnormality has been found and off to open MRI Later today. The pain is out of control, the only relief i get is when I am asleep and that only happens when I go into basically a drug induced coma. 2 morphine pills a day and 4 Percosets still do not ease the pain when I sit or stand up. It is even starting to hurt while swimming at the Y. but I did find 1 spot in the hot tub there where my tailbone doesnt touch and i get some serious back relief.

I worry a lot that if I need surgery on my tailbone and spine that I could possibly have some paralysis which would really suck. I hate being this way but I always think the worst but I guess it prepares me better.



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I finally got some free counseling through the county and the free clinic I was going to before I got my Cobra. Saw the Psyciotrist twice and got some meds changed for the better and saw a counseler twice now and saw some light at the end of this ever squeezing shut tunnel. So I fill out some paperwork today and they wanted me to sign here, initial there... one of which says I have no insurance of my own or through my spouse. I said, I have cobra, I thought this was Free (as was stated in the letter they sent me asking me to take advantage of this FREE benefit through the county) Now Im told I can no longer go to the free clinic because they cant see anyone with insurance and i cant go to counseling because even though they take insurance, I would still have to pay a copay and cannot afford another $50.00 a month. Sooooo, there goes therapy. Couldnt get help when i didnt have insurance and cant get help now that I have it even though my cobra runs out in 2 months and then I dont know what I will do. BC/BS of Ohio has told me the same plan I am on will cost me $1,200.00 a month because of my "Pre-Existing Condition" I have BC/BS now, how can they do that?  Answer - They just can. I even brought up Obama Care and they said nothing will be done about pre-existing conditions till next year (and that still may change).

I go in for my biopsy in the morning and this is all i need on top of thinking about what my results may be. I will probably have to wait till next week for results. I have no idea what I am going to do at this point. sometimes I swear being sick is the easiest part. as the title says - THE SYSTEM SUX 
I am so tired of fighting for everything and watching "some people" abuse the system and get away with it every single day! If I was an illeagal, I would be getting free healthcare. If I was a bum and didnt want to even try to work, I would get a check every month as well as foodstamps. They can smoke and drink and trade stamps for drug money and the System still helps them, but me??? I GET NOTHING but the small amount of SS that I WORKED for and PAID into for YEARS. Nothing more, not even help from Medicare for another year (if I get to stay on SS that long). Oh well, I certainly hope nobody else has to go through this the way I did/am. I have no idea what the Hell I am going to do at this point. I use almost a third of my check  JUST FOR insurance and medication refills. pay a couple bills around the house and still cant afford all my copays so I end up cancelling appointments just so I dont get another bill. THE SYSTEM SUX!!!








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I finally figured out how to get my stupid phone to get the Brawdcast and was able to call in and talk to / update the people who saved my life. Early on in my battle with cancer when I was fired from my job, turned down by the welfare system, and not yet elegible for Social Security, These are the Twitter / Podcast Goddesses who spread the word about my plight and took me from 50 twitter followers to over 300 and they kept my website popping up on Twitter and talked about my story enough that my EXTREMELY EXPENSIVE Cobra Insurance was paid for by twitter people in the pest network. I would have been lost without them and there help. My faith in humanity was totally restored because of all the total strangers to me (twitter friends) came together and carried me through my roughest time in my life both financially and spiritually. Even people who couldnt donate at least tweeted me with positive thought to help me through another day (and often times I didnt want to go on another day but someone was always with me in Twitter Spirit). I am sooooo greatfull to the Brawdcast Crew for passing my story along when otherwise it would have just fallen on the deaf ears of a burocratic society. I cant thank them enough and it was sooooo good to hear them tonight. (i have been having computer problems and havnt been able to listen for a while) be sure to follow them on twitter @brawdcast --- Love You Guys (and especially You Gals)


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Had a PETSCAN done last week because my lymph nodes are swollen for no apperant reason. It came back with sketchy positive results for cancer. But this time on the right side lymph nodes instead of the left. This showed up on my original PETSCAN but they thought of it as a false positive because this type of cancer typically stays on one side. On my last PETSCAN this did not show up at all. I now have some noticible swelling in my neck so thet sent me last week and the results  show positive on the right side. I need to have a biopsy done but because my neck is so "thick and muscular" According to the Dr, I have to have a catscan assisted biopsy so they can hit one of the nodes that is lit up on the petscan  showing cancer. Let the games begin------Again.


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Went to a trade show for magic on Saturday, was gone all day, took my power chair so I wouldn't use up all my energy and did have a great time. started getting tired and sore near the end and after finally making it home (the drive was a disaster, I forgot where I was and forgot where I was going. At one point I was doing enough over the speed limit that even I got scared) but as I said, I finally made it home and flopped straight down on the bed. Oh, the muscles started to twist then the all over pain set in. slept in short spurts but not very long just a whole bunch of them. Kept waking up to very surreal dreams (this has been happening a lot lately along with some mild halucinations while awake) mostly I hear things that cant be explained and I see weird things out of the corner of my eyes and when i look they are gone - sometimes I see the same thing again as soon as I look back at the tv again. Trippy like a Hippy Maaaan. I see a shrink in the morning tomorrow so maybe I can get some meds changed around if that may be the cause, but I don't think it has to do with my meds cause I've been on them a long time with no problems. Maybe the voices in my head are hanging out with the monster in the basement and little gremlins and garden gnomes are messing with me. Anyhow, after my driving experience on Saturday I decided I wont be going anywhere alone for a while except to the Dr and back maybe. 17 years on the road as a trucker, I don't scare easy - but that shit scared me. I was glad to get out for a bit and take my mind off waiting for the petscan results to see if my cancer is back in my lymph nodes. they were pretty swollen last week and there was no reason for it so the Doc sent me for a scan. I hate not knowing almost as much as I hate knowing that I am going to get Prostate Cancer in a couple years since my father and his father both had it. I have been getting my PSA done for a few years so I can stay up on it and catch it sooner. Oh well enough for this weeks episode of blogger that only gets read by relati